Friday, January 6, 2012

Wedding Blog Land Makes Me Feel Old

I know my blog has veered into wedding blog land in recent months.  I hope you all understand that most of my home projects have gone on hold while I juggle work and wedding planning.  I did replace the handle on the toilet a few nights ago, but while I would have blogged about that a year ago, it doesn't seem all that interesting right now.  Am I right?

Anyway, in Design Blog Land, I always felt really normal.  I think most design bloggers are professional women who happen to love design.  Some wind up working in design, but most of the time, that seems like a career change.  I don't know of many design bloggers who are just starting out.

In Wedding Blog Land, I'm old.  Like over the hill.  A lot of people assume that if you're in your mid-30s, you're an encore bride (on a second marriage).  For the first time in my life, I feel old!

Age was never really something I thought about all that much.  Perhaps it's because my mother wore her age fairly proudly and never seemed obsessed with looking younger.  People always seemed shocked to know her age.  Her hair stylist seems convinced that she has a colorist because she's still a redhead in her late 60s. 

Working in academia has probably kept me young at heart.  I'm surrounded by the energy and enthusiasm of students in the college bubble.  Though I finished graduate school just over a decade ago, people still ask me what year I am as if I'm a student.  I haven't yet considered that a compliment, but I know there's a time when I will.

Getting engaged at 33 felt just right.  I considered myself a city girl before coming to Virginia and city dwellers (especially those in the northern cities) tend to marry a little later than others.  I didn't realize that in the world of wedding blogs and message boards, I'm old.


Early on in my planning, I felt just fine about my age.  Everyone reading and commenting on wedding sites was in same process and I thought that would bind us together.  Over time, however, I started to notice the pictures.  I saw one stunning bride after another and as I looked at their amazing gowns and jewelry and hair, I also noticed their completely smooth complexions.

Now, I have a great skin, but at 34, I'm not without a line here and there.  I started to think that there was no way I would look as beautiful in my wedding pictures.  I'll have the amazing dress and the pretty details, but I fear that I won't have that youthful beauty that I see when I seek out wedding inspiration.


So what's a girl to do?  You buy wrinkle cream.  I did a bit of research online and decided to start using the Olay Pro-X line and consider seeing a dermatologist to bump up to something stronger about three months before the wedding. 

I started drinking more water, assuming that would help, but found articles from NPR and Real Simple that debunk that a bit.  I'll still drink water, but I'm not expecting it to be a fountain of youth.

Lastly, I decided to look through the portfolios of the makeup artists I've been considering to see if I can spot some brides who might be around my age.  I've been looking at blog posts and inspiration shoots, but most of those feature women in their early 20s.  I should probably be digging a little deeper.  There are plenty of 30-something brides, but we don't seem as prominent on the wedding blogs. 


Marc thinks I'm being totally silly.   He says I don't need any of this stuff.  My reasonable side knows that this is a short lived feeling.  That little voice of self-doubt remains.

Has anyone else felt more aware of their age while wedding planning?   How have you dealt with it?
[Share to Pinterest]

9 comments:

  1. First off - you will look gorgeous in your wedding photos. I refuse to believe otherwise.
    Interesting that you feel differently with design bloggers.  I feel a bit old around them too.  So many of my favorite bloggers seems to be 20 something stay at home mom and I (along with my uterus) feel ancient in comparison.  haha

    ReplyDelete
  2. You might want to check out the Washingtonian Magazine. 
    http://www.washingtonian.com/blogs/bridalparty/washington%20couples/index.html
    Many people in the DC area marry in their 30's.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my gosh, you are not an older bride at ALL! Most of my cousins married in their 30s/40s (heck, so did my parents) and they all looked fantastic, as will you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm with Mark!  Wrinkle cream? Oh dear. As I'm just about to turn 33 this weekend, now you have me worrying too! :)  Yep, I feel old in wedding land.  I like to think we're older and wiser. ;)
    PS: Statistics for divorce drop dramatically after you cross the 30-yr mark!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I think that once you've entered your thirties, you know yourself and are experienced enough in make-up, that you don't need a make-up artist.  A trip to a make-up counter for some up-to-the-minute bridal tips may just be enough!  You'll look gorgeous!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I started using eye creme after I commented on its use by a roommate in my early 20s. I said something like, "You're in your early 20s and don't have any wrinkles, what do you need eye creme for?"  Her response, "Exactly. And I woud like to keep it that way."  It made sense so I picked up a little jar of clear Olay eye creme--the same one my roommate used--on my next trip to CVS. I still use the clear one during the day, but bumped up my evening creme to Olay's thicker pink versionat 30. In my mid-30s now, I can report that they do the trick and I seem to have more youthful eyes than most in my age bracket.

    Even though I'm a believer in the creme, I have to agree with Mark and say you shouldn't really be worried. I also wouldn't go so far as to see a doctor for something stronger. As Jane said, divorce statistics drop with age (I read that it starts around 26) in marriage. You should wear your age proudly!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dont fret! I am a 30-something bride-although I am an encore bride ;)  We're in our prime girl! Enjoy it! A little wrinkle adds character! You're going to look beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  8. You already look beautiful so please don't worry about wrinkles!  I do have to agree with Elizabeth though that there's nothing wrong with using a product to maintain your look.  But you know another reason why all these brides have flawless complexions in photos?  You see, there is this thing called Adobe Photoshop.  K was completely sweaty the day of our engagement shoot and had sweat trickling down his face the entire time.  Yet our photos are sweat-free.  Hmm, imagine that! ;)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh my - 33 is an amazing age to get married and you are going to look beautiful on your wedding day whatever you decide!  Thank you for your comment on my blog - and I am so glad you shared all those images of Pippin Hill, the venue is stunning and I really think had it been around a few years ago when I tied the knot, I would have made the jump from Illinois out to Virginia just to have my nuptials there, definitely a place I went to travel to in order to see in person!

    ReplyDelete

This comment format is not supported. Please refresh and use the Disqus box!

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.